Life Tips · Relationships

Day 46 – When “Let it go” isn’t enough.

I am all too often convinced that people’s favorite phrase around me right now is, “let it go.”

Here are 5 reasons why sometimes letting it go is not the best option, and 5 things you can do instead.

1. If it is causing anger or frustration, clearly it matters to your heart and should be acknowledged.

Anger, hurt, frustration, confusion, and many other emotions can come from things people say or do to us or even to others that we encounter. If we were to let it go and not do anything, we are not acknowledging that our emotions matter.

2. We are not robots.

Robots could be programmed to just let it go and move on, but we are not programed for that, which means that we are not suppose to operate that way! We were given emotions for a reason, don’t just ignore them.

3. Because the emotions will grow if continually ignored.

If we just ignore the feelings and emotions and then the even happens again, we have build up feelings already and therefore the response will be doubled if a response is given out the next time.

4. Stress is bad for you.

having the constant stress of suppressing real and raw emotions is really bad for your health. It’s not good for you! … see post on stress for more here!

5. Because it’s impossible.

I have yet to meet someone who can truly let things go. They can act like it, they may even seem convincing for a while, but they never fully let it go.

So since it’s clearly not going to work to just, “Let it go!” Here are 5 things to do instead.

1. Journal it out.

Write down every ounce of hurt and frustration and anger and anything else you can think of. Get it all out!

2. Cry.

Tears are literally healing to the emotional systems of our bodies and release endorphins at the same time, so cry. Cry a lot.

3. Do something about it if possible.

Talk to the person, see if there is a way to bring resolution.

4. Write a letter… and don’t mail it.

Write a letter to the person expressing every little detail. And don’t mail it. Maybe even burn it. Either way, the point is to get it out.

5. Talk to someone.

Honestly, this doesn’t have to be a person! My chickens, goats, cows, and rabbits (when we had them) have all heard some very personal, in detail stories about my life! And the best part? You never have to worry about gossip! … well, except for maybe among themselves! 😉

My best friend and parents have also sat through many, many, many tears and stayed up late listening to my heart, and for that I am truly thankful! At times friends are more objective and less “fix-it” oriented than parents, which is my preference, yet parents also have a lot of wisdom to share, so both are wonderful in their respective cases!

When I have had mentors in my life, they have been people I’ve gone too.

The point in all of these methods is: Get it out in a healthy manner.

Ultimately, pray through it and remember that life will go on, and living with un forgiveness is truly hurting you and one day you will see the bigger picture. One day, it will make sense. But today is not that day. Today the heart is raw, it is in pain, and it is not okay. And all of that is okay.

46 days down, 310 to go!

 

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